Illness Unseen (YOU)

I don't know who YOU are or how I came into having YOU but this is beyond.
I am so sick and tired of the control YOU have over me I want to live my life, but YOU do.
What did I do to deserve YOU?
Why do YOU hate me?
All of my struggles all my work.
All my rewards gone.
I earned my life and took every blow it took to get here.
YOU don't own me but YOU run my life.
I hate this damn curse YOU have inflicted on me.
Why would YOU wait in hiding all the while watching.
Waiting till my dreams were lain out on the wall perfectly.
Then YOU, YOU just decide OK too much DONE no more life for me.
I am still here and I am still fighting to stay alive I have not given up, yet....
The days wear on but the outside world can't see YOU, I look perfectly fine to them.
FINE...I would settle for one day one hour with out YOU at this point.
I would like YOU to leave just ME alone with my husband so he can hug me and not hurt me.
One more cast of the fishing pole reel in that 19" rainbow one more time.
One more "Practice round" at the bowling alley with Mr. H and Mrs. H.
One more ride in the car, My turn to drive.
Alas no YOU are here and no one else knows it but me.
I don't know what YOU are but I HATE YOU!!!!
I hate YOU for what YOU have turned me into.
Just Go away,
YOU.